Well, I finally have a court date set for the start of my Custody hearing, and I have a lawyer.

I'm babysitting my 3 month old neice, who really seems attached to me. It was sooo funny. On mother's day me, brother, my sister and her family, and I took my mom and Granny out to luch. Makayla (Kayla for short) fussed and fussed. She was so tired but woiuldn't sleep. Everybody passed her around, but she wouldn't sleep. Then I asked to hold her, and sure enough, 5 min later she was passed out., with a smile. My sister said my mom looked jealous and upset over it. Both my kids sat next to me. Everyone had a good time.


I found a Church that I am getting involved in. I still beleive in the Goddess, and fairies, and all that good stuff, but this Church accepts that. They say that God looks diffrent to everyone. They are really trying to make a diffrence in the community, and the surmons always touch me. The first one was about being the person The One Above sees you as, allowing Them to touch you and guid you so that you can be better. Then there was one last week about being at peace with everyone and forgiving. The preacher said that the most beautiful sunset you will ever see, is when you forgive and don't hold anything againtst anyone and when there is true peace in your heart. That day my BF, her son, and I prayed and forgave people for the wrongs they had done. I forgave my mom for her hurtfull words and actions, and we all forgave the man who shot my husband. (I feel i understand him now. All this time he had been reaching out for help and no one gave it to him or even listened, until Sean. The poor guy didn't know how to handle it, so he lashed out.) And that every night we frogave everyone, we were greeted with a rainbow during th sunset.


I really just nervous now. I want the best for my kids, and I hope that the best is me.